Somebody Stop the Pope – 1



Our Pope, please stop this

Episode 1

0. Prologue.

1.

I think it’s X.

So it’s not me it’s the Earth.

Kwaaaaaaaang-!

Woohoo!

“Heh heh.”

I smiled bitterly as I looked at the wyvern howling in front of me.

Of course the wyvern which is called a fake dragon is not such a rare beast. Rather it is a common beast.

They are called the demons that herald the beginning of the invasion of the Dragon Legion and I have slaughtered hundreds of thousands of them over the past ten years.

But the problem is.

“Why is the wyvern flying with Mapo Bridge in the background?”

A river shining with the glow of sunset.

And the huge bridges built across that river.

“Shhhhhhh-.”

“Team Leader! Support is coming soon! Just hold on a little longer!”

“What do you mean I want the wyvern cubs to hold out in my stomach? Tell them to hurry up and bring reinforcements you piece of shit!”

People fighting fiercely against wyverns spitting out curses in the Korean language they longed for.

Finally there was a sign that clearly said ‘Yeouido Hangang Park’ written in Korean rolling around the lawn.

All of this evidence proved that the place where I was standing was Yeouido Hangang Park.

By the way that strange iron structure over there that has become a wyvern’s nest is definitely Mapo Bridge.

As I watched that absurdly unnatural scene an honest review came out of my throat without me knowing it.

“Ugh fuck.”

It’s Earth that I’ve returned to after 10 years.

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Even if I make a hundred concessions they say that even mountains and rivers change in 10 years so I expected that it would be different from what I remembered.

But isn’t this honestly crossing the line?

In 10 years even the mountains and rivers will change into another world is that it?

To be honest it was so bizarre and unnatural that I could almost dismiss it as a dream.

Because so much has changed for me to say that the Earth is the way I remember it.

But the cold wind brushing past my cheek and the pungent smell of blood reaching my nose were proof that this place was an undeniable reality.

If she were the Queen of Nightmares she could create dreams like this but there was absolutely no chance that these scenes before her eyes were dreams she had created.

Not only would I not be able to have such a dream due to the divine power within my body but above all the Queen of Nightmares…

“You pulled the head off with your own hands didn’t you? Your Holiness my proud Pope. How sexy it was to see you pulling that vulgar bitch’s head off.”

“…Limen?”

Just like that guy said I made the mess with my own hands.

I frowned and slowly turned towards the direction where the voice came from.

There was a woman with silver hair looking at me and smiling.

Her name is Limen.

Limen shines brightly even in this chaotic and bizarre landscape.

It is an incredibly beautiful being that is hard to believe is human and the expression is perfectly fitting.

“Siwoo. You came back to your hometown but you don’t look so good. Isn’t it pointless to send you back like this?”

“Didn’t our contract end when we returned to Earth?”

“It’s disappointing. But she was once a goddess you served so show her some respect and affection. I’m the one who allowed you to return to Earth safely!”

She slowly approached me whining.

I gritted my teeth and answered her.

“If you hadn’t dragged me into that damn world in the first place wouldn’t I have suffered?”

“That may have been the case but if I had stayed on Earth I would have definitely died.”

“How can you be sure of that?”

“As His Holiness the Pope knows I am a goddess. Of course he would know.”

She waved her hand lightly as she said so.

Woohoo.

Then immediately everything before my eyes stopped.

The wyverns were running wild lusting after human flesh.

There were also people who were desperately trying to stop such a wyvern.

Even the river that had been flowing leisurely under the sunset glow came to a halt.

[Warning! The Lord of another dimension is forcibly interfering with the causality of <Dimension: Earth>!]

[Strong causality demands that the natural order be followed.]

[Your time will stop for 5 minutes as <Error: Time Paradox> is feared.]

“Hmm. I guess 5 minutes is the limit? Since this is the dimension where the main event is taking place I think causality is very strong. I’m interfering as the main ruler of this dimension but… It’s a shame.”

Limen smiled faintly and then looked around as he continued speaking.

“I don’t have time to explain in detail so I’ll get to the point. Do you want to make another contract with me?”

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“contract?”

“Yeah! Unlike 10 years ago this time it’s a contract that Siwoo can sign if he wants to. If he doesn’t want to he doesn’t have to! But I personally want Siwoo to agree to the contract… You don’t like it?”

She says so and looks at me.

That’s because he knew how much the word ‘contract’ had tormented me for the past ten years.

Not only did Limen kidnap an ordinary young man from Earth he also exploited him for labor for ten years.

An ordinary young man who didn’t even know how to pull out a weed grew to the point where he could pull out the heart of a demon dragon and the hearts of the seven great demon lords as if they were weeds. That says it all.

Looking back it was truly a hellish 10 years.

My original plan was to return to a peaceful Earth and happily resume my daily life but…

That must have already been said.

How can you take a peaceful walk on Earth where wyverns are running around so energetically?

“Tell me something.”

I nodded letting out a deep sigh.

Then Limen immediately spoke with a bright face.

“Really? I honestly worried about what would happen if Siwoo couldn’t accept this situation! I worried a lot about what would happen if he got shocked and went crazy because his hometown had changed like this.”

“After experiencing other worlds it’s a bit disconcerting to see monsters appear on Earth… It’s just not that bad is it?”

Unrealistic?

My very existence is already a symbol of unreality.

Limen nodded as if he was impressed by my calm answer and then spoke to me with an innocent face.

“If you make a contract with me I will allow you to copy the divine power that Siwoo used in the other world. Of course there are some conditions attached because there are no believers in me here…”

“wait for a sec.”

“why?”

“Wasn’t it natural that divine power would also be transferred across dimensions?”

“Hey dimensional travel isn’t that easy. You need to coordinate between dimensions and you also need to pay attention to causality… It’s only natural that you’ll lose power right? Oops! You only have 3 minutes left.”

“What if I don’t sign the contract?”

Limen answered my question with a sullen expression.

“The divine power will be lost and you will never see me again. Don’t worry. Siwoo will be able to grow again quickly even without my divine power. Ten years ago I was in a hurry and couldn’t help it but this time I will let Siwoo choose. I am sorry too.”

I have to re-sign to maintain my power?

But this time you’re giving me a choice?

This wasn’t a joke this was real there wasn’t even a single thing to worry about.

“I think I’m going crazy.”

“I really don’t want to sign another contract with you…”

“No I really think I’m going crazy.”

“…huh?”

“What on earth are you doing if you don’t sign the contract right now!”

“Is that true? Then let’s sign the contract right away?”

I’m already upset because the Earth has become X so you want me to start over from scratch?

I don’t like it.

I don’t want to be the protagonist of such a one-hit wonder cliche.

Even if I really really die.

2.

“Siu?”

“uh.”

“The contract is complete. Now Siu can use divine powers on Earth.”

At the same time golden message windows appeared before my eyes.

[Constellation contract completed.]

[<Dimension: Eden>’s main seat <Limen> supports the human <Kim Si-woo>!]

[Since a contract has been made with a constellation from another dimension the causality of <Dimension: Earth> will investigate the legitimacy of this contract. Please wait a moment.]

[5…4…3…2…1]

[Investigation Results: No issues.]

I looked at the message window and asked Limen in a suggestive tone.

“Did the system come over too?”

This message window is the identity of the special function that helped me grow quickly in Eden along with Limen’s support.

aka system.

A feature that quantified my growth and helped me adapt to Eden more easily.

I asked Limen several times about the source of this function but he never answered.

But since the system is there too I feel somewhat secure….

“Ah! That? It didn’t come over together but actually went over from Earth to Eden. That function was prepared for the main event on Earth. I secretly copied it when I took Siwoo to Eden because it seemed good for growth!”

“…Is it originally from Earth?”

“If you really want to be specific? I’m sorry Siwoo. I wanted to tell you but I couldn’t tell you in Eden due to restrictions.”

So what I’m saying is that the system that I thought had special features actually originated on Earth…?

I have no idea what’s going on.

But this time too Limen seemed unable to give me a detailed explanation.

[Time will resume after 1 minute.]

“Unfortunately I don’t have a foundation in this world yet so we can’t stay together for long. There are many things you want to ask me but that’s for later. From now on there’s something Siwoo absolutely has to do.”

Limen said that and grabbed my hand tightly.

Then he continued speaking with tears welling up in his eyes.

“For now the divine power has been somehow resolved through a contract but the fundamental issue has not been resolved. It may disappear someday.”

“We don’t have time so let’s start with the solution.”

“Divine power is a power that is based on someone’s belief so if there is no belief it will naturally disappear. So in order for Si-woo to maintain his power he just has to create people on Earth who believe in him! Easy right? Si-woo was the Pope!”

“Are you telling me to become a cult leader?”

“I don’t know what that is but just give me a lot of followers. That’s all I need! Do you understand?”

Woohoo.

Little by little Limen’s shape becomes blurred.

And in the fading halo Limen cried out to me earnestly.

“I’ll see you again soon! Don’t cry when I’m gone! Okay? You understand? Our Pope….”

And with that desperate cry.

[Time passes quickly.]

Time which had stopped began to flow again and I looked at the additional message that appeared before my eyes smiling in vain.

[A quest occurs!]

[Establishment of a religious order]

Type: Main

Description: This world lacks believers who serve your god. In order to maintain your power create a sect and increase your influence. There are no limits to the means and methods and this system automatically tallies the number of believers in conjunction with the main event of the dimension.

Completion Condition: Believer Number 1/10000

*Warning! This quest has a time limit of 90 days. If you fail to complete the quest within the time limit everything you own will be reset!

I couldn’t help but laugh as I looked at that message window.

“haha.”

…I think it turned out to be X.

“Fuck.”

This time it’s me.

Our Pope please stop this